A lot of people I talk to feel like life is happening to them. Rent goes up. Groceries go up. Decisions get made somewhere else, by someone else, and too often those decisions seem to make things worse, not better. People ask, “What can we do?”
So, they do what feels possible. They put their heads down, work harder and stop talking. Some stay quiet because they’re exhausted and convinced nothing will change. Some because speaking up feels risky. Either way, we end up carrying our burdens alone, each of us feeling like we’re the only one.
That isolation is a real problem. When a community stops talking and stops feeling connected, people disengage, and decisions get made without them.
When I taught students on the autism spectrum, I learned something that has stayed with me. You can’t teach a kid to connect by telling them to, or sometimes even by showing them how. Connection grows when people take on something together. For one group of my students, it was building an obstacle course for squirrels. They focused on the goal, found each other’s strengths, worked through challenges and learned that working together creates so much more than just a task accomplished — it grows the individual and the community.
Adults aren’t so different. We don’t find each other by being told to get along. We find each other by taking on something real, together. And when we do, something shifts. You’re no longer a passenger. You’re behind the wheel, and you get a say in where we’re headed.
Right now, the cost of living is weighing on all of us: rent and mortgages, groceries, childcare, utilities. It doesn’t care whether you’re left, right, or center; it hits families and the local businesses we count on alike. It can feel like a runaway train, and we’re left asking: who’s driving?
But a challenge this widely shared is exactly the kind that can bring people together. I’ve seen what happens when people who disagree unite around something that hits home. Things move. Things grow. Things change.
We haven’t lost our power. We buried it, one silent night at a time, under the weight each of us was carrying alone. Now we dig it out. Not someday. Not when things calm down, because they don’t calm down. Now.
Ask yourself: is this working? Is this the road we want to stay on? Is this the legacy we leave for the next generation? If the answer is no, doing nothing isn’t an option.
So bring what you’re carrying and set it down beside mine. Pull up a chair next to the neighbor who voted differently, and let’s face the challenge head-on. It’s time to take the wheel. Together.
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Amalie O’Connor is a longtime Olympia resident, mother, former educator and federal budget analyst, and the founder of Evergreen Growing. She believes Washington’s best days are yet to come.
Join Evergreen Growing’s next community session, hosted by Amber & Aloe Spray Tan Studio and Prime Fitness: Monday, Oct. 26, 5 to 7 p.m., 4528 Maple Lane SE, Olympia. All are welcome. Come to talk, or just come to listen and meet some new neighbors. evergreengrowing.org.
